Sorry for the lack of posts recently (as if you really care :p) but have had a bit of a busy weekend for once. Most of my time was spent with family, recently my parents have got hold of an allotment in the town in which we live, and I spent a lot of Saturday and some of Sunday helping clear the land a bit. I really love being outdoors and I guess more in touch with nature (sounds a bit daft I know). I find it quite therapeutic and it feels to be very constructive too (much better then being sat on the computer not doing a lot, or sat watching TV, which has recently become one of my favourite pastimes).
I’ve heard before that being outdoors is good for the soul, I don’t think its very healthy both physically and mentally to be stuck indoors all the time, which I find occasionally happens with me. On a more interesting note, I’ve also heard that being outdoors/working outdoors can be good for people who suffer with mental health problems (such as depression, etc). I think if you suffer from Social Anxiety Disorder then being outdoors is a great medicine for you, it helps you to feel more alive and more free. Especially if you are doing something like gardening, where you could be growing fruits and vegetables, watching something grow, and then eating it, which is a very rewarding experience. I’ve heard someone that has been cured of their Social Anxiety Disorder that said that getting a dog was the thing that solved their illness – the dog was something that they had to look after and care for, and had to be taken out for walks etc.
Now anyway, back to the rather controversial blog post title – do people with Social Anxiety Disorder secretly fancy themselves? Now, I realise that this may sound quite strange, but sometimes I wonder if secretly I/other sufferers of Social Anxiety perhaps subliminally love their looks or their person. Which could be a good thing I guess. But anyway the reason I said this is the fact that people with SAD seem to get so self conscious. I mean, walking into a busy store is quite a big deal for some people, who feel that everyone will be looking at them or watching them, that they will do something which is stupid and which will draw even more attention to themselves, they’ll get really embarrassed etc and will want to get out of that store pretty quick. What I want to know is, what makes me so special that anyone (let alone everyone) is going to simply look at me, or stare at me, just by walking into a store? Why is it that people with Social Anxiety feel that everyone will be watching them which makes them feel uneasy? I’ve come to the conclusion that maybe I secretly fancy myself, which is why I think everyone will look at me when I’m in a busy place! Lol well don’t worry, I don’t fancy myself, to be honest when it comes to my appearance I’m not too bothered, I mean there’s not a lot that you can do about how you look so I tend not to worry. I worry more about how I convey myself or carry myself, how I act, what I say, etc etc.
Today was another pretty good day anyways, had my haircut which is sometimes a bit of an ordeal but its nice to get out the house and get it done. I like to get it done when I need it and not delay it, otherwise I get worked up and don’t look forward to going. Sometimes I feel a bit uncomfortable sitting in the chair and not really making much conversation with the hairdresser, other times I just think I’m here to get my haircut and I’m paying my money so I should just relax and not worry about it. After that I checked my post at my local sorting office, did some work at home, and then played football in the evening. One thing which kind of annoyed me was a person I spoke to on MSN briefly. Basically they said I looked rough, which isn’t exactly a very nice thing to say to someone who you had just met. Anyway you always get people like that in life, just got to get over it and not let those kind of people bring you down (thanks Claire ;) ). I’ll make another post soon hopefully, will end this one for now as I find I could go on forever otherwise!
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